The decision to divorce is usually only made after considerable thought about whether the relationship is salvageable or not. Once you know that you’re going to divorce, you have to embark on one of the most difficult aspects of the end of the marriage – dealing with your mind and emotions.
Some people who choose to divorce feel shame or guilt about the end of the marriage because they were raised to believe that divorce is never acceptable. What they don’t realize is that sometimes, staying in a bad marriage can do more harm than good. Remembering this throughout the process can help you to focus on what’s important – your healing and new life.
One thing that makes this situation so difficult to deal with is that you will likely experience loneliness. You have to learn to live life as a single person, which is difficult in its own way. You also need to cope with the fact that you’ll likely lose some of the people who are closest to you.
Your children might be another difficult aspect of the split — even if they’re adults. They may not have ever lived without both parents in the same home, so this will be a big change for them. It’s possible that they will go through spells during which they won’t want to speak about the split, but you can encourage them to be open about it. You might be able to help them work through their feelings.
Some individuals opt to work through the emotional toll of divorce before they start the legal process. While this might work for some, it won’t be right for everyone. Think about the circumstances of your situation and decide how to move forward with the end of your marriage. When the time is right, seek appropriate legal assistance.