If you’re hoping you can divorce without affecting your kids, it’s essential to realize that is unrealistic.
The breakup of their family will always have some effect. However, you can do things to minimize the negative ones.
Make time to listen to your kids
The time while you work out your divorce and immediately after can be hectic for the adults involved. It’s easy to get so wrapped up in sorting things out, looking for a new place to live and working to make up for lost income that your kids might feel you’ve forgotten about them.
They need you more than ever at this time. They might not be able to put all their feelings into words, so be prepared to work hard to find out how they are coping.
Remember that just because your child might not want to tell you something, that does not mean they don’t want to tell someone. If they have a close relationship with other adults in their life, such as grandparents, teachers or coaches, let them know you are divorcing and ask if they would be willing to chat with your child.
Do all you can to keep things civil with your spouse
Chances are that you and your co-parent have some negative feelings toward each other. That’s fine, but you cannot let your kids get caught in the crossfire. Rather than thinking about the other person as the enemy, work together to negotiate the terms of your divorce and to do what is best for your kids.
Getting experienced legal help to handle divorce and custody matters can help you wrap things up in less time, leaving you more time to focus on helping your kids through this challenging moment.